A few weeks ago, I paused paid subscriptions on this newsletter in an effort to figure out what I wanted to do with it. My day job had gotten increasingly busy, and the last thing I wanted to do at 5.30pm was close one screen and open another to write again. I was feeling creatively uninspired, stifled by the commitments I’d set for myself. Such is the peril of turning your hobbies into side hustles. I thought if I turned off billing and focused on making one really good, free newsletter a month, I’d be able to get myself back on track.
But then, I unexpectedly lost my very dear friend, Nick. His passing has devastated his family, his partner, and his many friends. Losing someone so young, so full of life, the best and most talented of us, has been world-altering. I barely feel like the person I was before it happened. One day I’m fine (which, I’ve come to learn, simply means “distracted”), and the next, I’m absolutely shattered all over again. There can be other emotions around grief, as Evan Ross Katz recently wrote in his newsletter, and I guess it’s all about how close I am (or how close I allow myself to get) to it on any given day. But it’s still fresh, and I need time.
I’ll be back soon, I’m sure, but thanks for reading – and to my paid subscribers, I really appreciate your support. I’ll see you all in a little while.
Sorry for your loss Valerie, please take your time, don't feel any pressure. Lots of love to you x
Ah Valerie, I'm so sorry for your loss. Take your time, we'll be here.